After not hearing a peep out of my former intern from hell, I figured that he had indeed moved to San Fransisco to mooch off his Mom, as was originally planned. So, I was surprised to get a call from someone this morning asking me for a reference on his behalf. Here's how the conversation went...
Her: So, can you you confirm tat Intern did indeed work with you during the dates he specified?
Me: Sure.
Her: What was the nature of the work that Intern did while he was working with you.
Me: He worked in the graphics department and was assigned mostly production oriented tasks.
Her: What would you say his greatest strengths were?
Me: Ummm...hmmmm...ahhhhh... (long pause) Can we come back to this question?
Her: Okay, what would you say his greatest weakness is?
Me: Oooh... (another long pause because I'm biting my tongue) Can you tell me what position he's applied for with your copmany? It might give me a better indication as to how to best answer your questions.
Her: Sure. He's applied to be part of our computer sales team. Knowing that, do you think he's suitable for the role?
Me: With that bit of information, I can probably give you better answers than I've been able to thus far. (laughter) What I can say for Intern is that he's extremely knowledgeable when it comes to computers - both hardware and software. He knows his stuff and really knows his way around the machines. I would hestitate though, to place him in direct line with clients because he does tend to have trouble carrying himself well in business settings. He probably needs more work, and perhaps a little coaching in this area.
Her: Funny, we picked up the same thing during his interview. Now, was he punctual?
Me: Not exactly...
Her: Late to work?
Me: Yes. (I hestitated to add "every single day" - but in the end decided to give him a break and leave it at that.)
Her: Okay. Now, at the end of his internship, you had no need for him anymore?
Me: You could say that.
Her: If you had an opening, would you consider hiring him again?
Me: Hmmm...for a strictly production-oriented contract position, I might consider it (if I was really desparate!)
Her: Great. Thanks for your time.
Okay, this was grossly paraphrased, of course, but you get the idea. I was the perfect picture of diplomacy and restraint throughout the entire conversation. Truthful, yet tactful. After I hung up, I laughed so hard, I almost started crying. I told boss man about it at lunch and he couldn't stop laughing either.
I should probably mention that I'm not like this with all my interns. In fact, I loved my first intern so much, he's been working part-time with me (paid with real, honest -to-goodness money this time) for the past month and will be covering for me while I'm away. See, I'm not completely evil. I'm a good reference for the good kids - and a civil one for the, shall we say, 'sub par' ones.
Wednesday, July 21, 2004
Tuesday, July 20, 2004
the gluttonous paranoid leper
gluttony
As I sit here typing, I’m consuming my second bowl of Chef Boyardee. I know, I know… In my defence, I just got home after a twelve-hour long day today and am hungry as well, so give a man a break! I have to admit that I started to feel a little guilty about what I was stuffing myself with, when I was standing beside the zapper, so I threw some salad greens into a bowl along with some blueberries and cashews just to make my meal somewhat more ‘rounded.’ I doubt it will do much to offset the other crap that I’m eating, but it makes me feel healthier, okay?
Come to think of it, I grabbed lunch at the grease factory today as well. Man, oh man! One day, I’m going to wake up and find a fat old slob facing me in the mirror saying, ”What the hell happened to you?”
Tomorrow I start running again.
If I can get myself up early enough…
paranoia
Had a chat with my manager today – same old same old…I’ve been working too much overtime, need to cut back, etc. Then we briefly got to talking about how my job description has changed unofficially over the past several months, to the point where I’m doing the job of two people in two distinctly separate roles (his words, not mine). Neither of us wanted to get too deep into the conversation, as we’re both kind of expecting to talk about all of this and more during my performance evaluation this Thursday. I think I can safely say that this one will run pretty long. Beside the fact that I love having hours devoted strictly to talking about myself (I don’t.), I have a lot on my mind and probably just as much to get off my chest.
He mentioned that our HR Manager had been asking about where I was in terms of pursuing other opportunities - whether I was still looking within the company or if I had started to set my sights externally. She had tried to ask me the same thing about a week ago in a roundabout kind of way, but I didn’t really give her a straight answer then. Not wanting to reveal too much, I was purposefully vague, which probably bothered her a bit, since I’m usually quite open with her.
I guess since my last opportunity to go to Greece got trampled on, I’ve started to get kind of paranoid about whom to trust. As much as they tell me that they will do everything that they can to support me, I still can’t help but feel that they are looking out for their best interests first, and mine second - but only if it suits them.
So, I’m still waffling on whether or not I will disclose fully my dealings with the folks in Sweden. This afternoon, after our conversation, I considered telling him everything, but now, I’m considering everything more strategically and I’m not so sure. Then again, if they really want to screw me over, they’ll do it anyway, and there’s not really much I can do about it. The thing is, that regardless of what happens, while he's still my manager, he can make life as pleasant, or as miserable for me as he wants to.
I really hate having to think like this. It makes my head hurt!
Amusingly enough, on the CD player right now, Jacksoul is belting his little heart out singing, “I believe that we should all exist together - that’s the only we can stand through stormy weather…” Sing it, bruthah!
leprosy
Okay, that may be an overly dramatic way to describe my current condition, but it's how I feel, dammit! I'm covered in bug bites from haging out in Jeanette and Tom's backyard all Saturday evening. As I was putting cortizone cream on myself this morning, I discovered three new red bumps. I swear, these suckers are multiplying and it's driving me nuts!
Despite being unknowingly devoured by mosquitos and various other insects, Saturday was a good time. I'll post photos as soon as I get my ass in gear...although it may also depend on how preparations for my trip go.
here they are...
summertiiime...and the living is eeeaaasy...
paper lanterns
As I sit here typing, I’m consuming my second bowl of Chef Boyardee. I know, I know… In my defence, I just got home after a twelve-hour long day today and am hungry as well, so give a man a break! I have to admit that I started to feel a little guilty about what I was stuffing myself with, when I was standing beside the zapper, so I threw some salad greens into a bowl along with some blueberries and cashews just to make my meal somewhat more ‘rounded.’ I doubt it will do much to offset the other crap that I’m eating, but it makes me feel healthier, okay?
Come to think of it, I grabbed lunch at the grease factory today as well. Man, oh man! One day, I’m going to wake up and find a fat old slob facing me in the mirror saying, ”What the hell happened to you?”
Tomorrow I start running again.
If I can get myself up early enough…
paranoia
Had a chat with my manager today – same old same old…I’ve been working too much overtime, need to cut back, etc. Then we briefly got to talking about how my job description has changed unofficially over the past several months, to the point where I’m doing the job of two people in two distinctly separate roles (his words, not mine). Neither of us wanted to get too deep into the conversation, as we’re both kind of expecting to talk about all of this and more during my performance evaluation this Thursday. I think I can safely say that this one will run pretty long. Beside the fact that I love having hours devoted strictly to talking about myself (I don’t.), I have a lot on my mind and probably just as much to get off my chest.
He mentioned that our HR Manager had been asking about where I was in terms of pursuing other opportunities - whether I was still looking within the company or if I had started to set my sights externally. She had tried to ask me the same thing about a week ago in a roundabout kind of way, but I didn’t really give her a straight answer then. Not wanting to reveal too much, I was purposefully vague, which probably bothered her a bit, since I’m usually quite open with her.
I guess since my last opportunity to go to Greece got trampled on, I’ve started to get kind of paranoid about whom to trust. As much as they tell me that they will do everything that they can to support me, I still can’t help but feel that they are looking out for their best interests first, and mine second - but only if it suits them.
So, I’m still waffling on whether or not I will disclose fully my dealings with the folks in Sweden. This afternoon, after our conversation, I considered telling him everything, but now, I’m considering everything more strategically and I’m not so sure. Then again, if they really want to screw me over, they’ll do it anyway, and there’s not really much I can do about it. The thing is, that regardless of what happens, while he's still my manager, he can make life as pleasant, or as miserable for me as he wants to.
I really hate having to think like this. It makes my head hurt!
Amusingly enough, on the CD player right now, Jacksoul is belting his little heart out singing, “I believe that we should all exist together - that’s the only we can stand through stormy weather…” Sing it, bruthah!
leprosy
Okay, that may be an overly dramatic way to describe my current condition, but it's how I feel, dammit! I'm covered in bug bites from haging out in Jeanette and Tom's backyard all Saturday evening. As I was putting cortizone cream on myself this morning, I discovered three new red bumps. I swear, these suckers are multiplying and it's driving me nuts!
Despite being unknowingly devoured by mosquitos and various other insects, Saturday was a good time. I'll post photos as soon as I get my ass in gear...although it may also depend on how preparations for my trip go.
here they are...
summertiiime...and the living is eeeaaasy...
paper lanterns
Friday, July 16, 2004
wish you were here...
I was at work for thirteen hours today, assembling press kits and dousing fires left and right, so I'm way too tired for words. Funny incident at dinner though, which I must impart - so I write on. Pardon the incoherent sentences and misspelled words if any happen to follow...
After previously mentioned thirteen hour day, I drove to an upscale Chinese restaurant to meet my family and extended family (my aunt, cousins, and in-laws) for dinner. It's the nine year anniversary of my favourite uncle's death from cancer and we get together every year for dinner to remember him and be together as a family - something he would have liked. So, this place is very swanky, in the Chinese definition of the term - big ass chandeliers, lots of mahogany furniture, gilded gold wall sconces, ornate tapestries on the walls, etc. Definitely very Chinese - not "fusion" or white-washed Chinese. Full on ten course meal, with a change of plates for every course. Like I said, fancy schtuff!
Anyway, a good meal was had by all, and lots of fun conversation around the table. Finally, as dessert rolls around, two of our waiters come to the table carrying a beautiful fruit flan with a lit candle, singing the birthday song. Keeping in mind the fact that we were there to commemorate the anniversary of my uncle's death, I wasn't sure how to react when these two sweet Chinese waiters came towards us with a birthday cake. They were singing quite intently and with such gusto that nobody had the heart to tell them to stop. There was just an uncomfortable silence at the table as everyone tried to make sense of what was happening.
Finally, I could take it no longer - the absurdity of the situation caused the laughter to pour out of me like a burst dam. Everyone joined in the nervous laughter and the poor waiters were left standing there without a clue as to why we were all laughing so hard and wondering who was going to blow out the candle on the cake and take the knife to cut the first slice. The sight of these two bewildered waiters made me laugh even harder, and I swear, I almost peed my pants!
Funny how the most inappropriate things make you laugh at the most inappropriate times, but can somehow become the perfect way to mark the moment. From his celestial vantage point, Uncle Peter was probably holding his belly laughing at that very moment as well.
After previously mentioned thirteen hour day, I drove to an upscale Chinese restaurant to meet my family and extended family (my aunt, cousins, and in-laws) for dinner. It's the nine year anniversary of my favourite uncle's death from cancer and we get together every year for dinner to remember him and be together as a family - something he would have liked. So, this place is very swanky, in the Chinese definition of the term - big ass chandeliers, lots of mahogany furniture, gilded gold wall sconces, ornate tapestries on the walls, etc. Definitely very Chinese - not "fusion" or white-washed Chinese. Full on ten course meal, with a change of plates for every course. Like I said, fancy schtuff!
Anyway, a good meal was had by all, and lots of fun conversation around the table. Finally, as dessert rolls around, two of our waiters come to the table carrying a beautiful fruit flan with a lit candle, singing the birthday song. Keeping in mind the fact that we were there to commemorate the anniversary of my uncle's death, I wasn't sure how to react when these two sweet Chinese waiters came towards us with a birthday cake. They were singing quite intently and with such gusto that nobody had the heart to tell them to stop. There was just an uncomfortable silence at the table as everyone tried to make sense of what was happening.
Finally, I could take it no longer - the absurdity of the situation caused the laughter to pour out of me like a burst dam. Everyone joined in the nervous laughter and the poor waiters were left standing there without a clue as to why we were all laughing so hard and wondering who was going to blow out the candle on the cake and take the knife to cut the first slice. The sight of these two bewildered waiters made me laugh even harder, and I swear, I almost peed my pants!
Funny how the most inappropriate things make you laugh at the most inappropriate times, but can somehow become the perfect way to mark the moment. From his celestial vantage point, Uncle Peter was probably holding his belly laughing at that very moment as well.
Thursday, July 15, 2004
wanted: nyc trip planner/tour guide
I'm gosh darned excited about going to see the bright lights of the big city, but way too lazy to plan my own trip. My super friend Lorraine, who recently resigned from the multinational hotel chain that she has been working at, has even offered me a friends and family discount rate before she leaves her job. The only problem is that I'm sick of looking at numbers and terrified of trying to figure out how much I can actually afford after everything is converted to Canadian Loonies. I'm not sure I can even afford to stay at said hotel chain even with the discount. This vexes my soul and makes my heart heavy. (Too melodramatic?) As I fly to Philly in about a week-and-a-half, here's my last-ditch plea to get someone else to plan my trip for me:
Trip planner/NYC tour guide wanted for August 21-26. Must be familiar with NYC (or at least know how to read a map). Only fun-loving, adventure-seeking individuals need apply. Spontaneity and general idiocy welcomed and generally encouraged. Payment will be rendered in the form of eternal gratitude (not in monetary exchange, since I will have little or none left after paying for the hotel). Free meals may be granted. The offering of my firstborn (if that is what you so desire as payment for services rendered) can also be negotiated. All interested parties are asked to submit their applications in the comments section below.
Wednesday, July 14, 2004
absolut triptych
Beacause she's one of my favourite people at work and because she's a collector of all things ABSOLUT, these are a series of illustrations which I'm planning on framing and presenting to my friend Katija, who's leaving the beautiful west coast for the freezing cold winters of montreal. Ahhhh, the things people do for love...
1. Reminiscent of the ABSOLUT CITRON ads, this one sets her fiery red hair and curly locks (from which she gets her nicknames 'Red' and 'Rusty') on an olive green background - her favourite colour and the colour of everything currently residing in her living room.
2. Beacause she's an interior decorator. And because cool blues paired with dark, rich chocolate browns are the new black & white, dontcha' know?
3. An unabashed spin-off of the ABSOLUT 24th ads that run during the holidays where you see a woman carrying boxes of holiday gifts home in the snow. I went with for the sappy entimental cheese and depcted her on moving day, as she sets out on a new adventure in Montreal. Certainly not the greatest or most striking illustration, but hey, it does the trick.
1. Reminiscent of the ABSOLUT CITRON ads, this one sets her fiery red hair and curly locks (from which she gets her nicknames 'Red' and 'Rusty') on an olive green background - her favourite colour and the colour of everything currently residing in her living room.
2. Beacause she's an interior decorator. And because cool blues paired with dark, rich chocolate browns are the new black & white, dontcha' know?
3. An unabashed spin-off of the ABSOLUT 24th ads that run during the holidays where you see a woman carrying boxes of holiday gifts home in the snow. I went with for the sappy entimental cheese and depcted her on moving day, as she sets out on a new adventure in Montreal. Certainly not the greatest or most striking illustration, but hey, it does the trick.
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