purgatory

My posting frequency has declined steadily over the past few months that I almost feel the need to overcompensate by writing one big ass post.

Over the past few months, I've been doing the back-and-forth with a prospective new employer in Philadelphia. He called to unofficially offer me a job back in January after I got back from vacation, but since the position wasn't yet vacant, he couldn't make a formal offer. Then, when the position was finally open in early February, the posting went up and he encouraged me to put in my aplpication - just to formalize everything. I tried to schedule an interview, but he told me there was no need - he'd already made up his mind that he wanted to hire me. I pressed for an interview, and he agreed, so we had sort of a reverse interview, where I ended up asking the majority of the questions.

After that, he said that he had to finish interviewing the rest of the candidates (in keeping with the HR policy) before he could go to HR and put together a formal job offer. Two weeks later, I hadn't heard anything yet, so I called him back. Apparently, he was in board meetings all week, so hadn't had an opportunity to finish interviews. I told him to hurry his ass up and get an offer drafted (with much more tact and diplomacy, of course) because I was losing patience. He agreed and promised to touch base with HR to see if he could expedite the process by getting the paperwork started before he finished interviewing, and keep me in the loop so I knew where things were at.

Friday, I still hadn't heard anything, and since I knew he was headed to Europe for meeting and a brief vacation with his family, wanted to touch base. Turns out he was out of the office, I guess in preparation for his two-week trip, so I guess I have another two weeks to wait before I hear from him. As you can probably tell, patience is not one of my strongest virtues. This is going to be the longest, most agonizing two weeks of my life!

Meanwhile, not being entirely sure if the Philadelphia opportunity will pan out, I've put myself back in the running for the job in Boston. Both jobs are essentially the same, although the scope and opportunities are somewhat different. I have a feeling taht the folks at head office would prefer to see me in Boston, but the longer term benefits of being in Philaldephia seem to outweigh the shorter term Boston benefits. Several months ago, I was agonizing over which opportunity to pursue. Then, I made up my mind that Philly would be the better option and starting planning my life around that eventuality. Now, despite the fact that my heart is still set on Philly, I'm just ready to take whichever opportunity decides topresent itself first.

I'm just really tired of waiting. And being stuck in this liminal space, between what I've been doing for the past three years and moving to new challenges in a new city, while exciting, is also kind of maddening. I feel like I've already done all the mental preparation that I need to do. I'm no longer freaked out by the prospect of uprooting myself and moving to the States, like I was a few months ago. At this point, I just want to get on with it!

At the same time, we're gearing up for some intense things at work right now, and I have half-a-mind to tell my manager not to count on me sticking around to see it all through to the end - just to be fair to him and the rest of the department. At the same time, I don't have a formal offer in hand, so I really don't have much to tell. Any announcement on my part would be foolhardy at this stage. Plus, the sadist in me wants to see the boss man squirm when he realizes that he's screwed if I leave. And he'll squirm more, the closer we get to deadline. For some strange reason though, I think he may already suspect that something's up. I don't have any concrete proof taht he knows, but let's just say that the prospective boss man in Philly doesn't exactly have a reputation for being tight-lipped. *sigh*

So, aside from the anxiety that this waiting is causing me, it's making it difficult for me to plan my vacation requests (which are due on Monday), or approve my assistant's requests. I've had to turn down a few speaking engagements at the old Alma Mater, miss out on buying concert tickets, and miss the sign-up deadline for the annual Vancouver Sun 10km Run. All of this, simply because I don't know where I'll be hanging my hat in the next month or two.

When this is all resolved, I'll breathe a huge sigh of relief. In the meantime, with my allergies rendering me a sneezing, snotty mess, and all this uncertainty making me cranky and irritable, I'm not fun to be around. Hence, my socially reclusive behaviour as of late.

This weekend, though has been somewhat better. I finally got outside, started some sketches and preliminary work on my sister's wedding invitation, took some photographs of the cherry blossoms, and picked up the latest HOW Magazine. Somewhere in there, I also managed to finish watching the adventures of Harold & Kumar, which I started watching during my weekend in Jersey last summer (appropriately enough), but never finished. Not the most intellectually stimulating film ever made, but amusing nonetheless and good for a few belly laughs. Also had lunch with my sister and her fiancee at Saffron Restaurant & Grill, a relatively new Indian restaurant in Burnaby. I haven't had good Indian food in a while, and it sure hit the spot!

It's a wonder what a little Indian food and frat boy humour can do to lift your spirits!


Belle :: Jack Johnson